“We went through series of rites. It… they called it Adjacent Othering. They were very keen to emphasize that. The Adjacent. Supposed to distinguish from something else, another process, that one I didn’t go through. I’d heard of it. It was… Far Othering. That was the name, not something anyone talked about. More of a rumor. It existed, not something anyone really knew anything about, except that it was a thing. So a process somebody had went through, maybe higher-ups. Hierarchy was sort of nebulous in the Immersium. Smoke and mirrors. Anyway it doesn’t matter since I didn’t encounter anything that was Far. They were very keen to emphasize, y’know, none of us were to get involved in anything Far, just Adjacent. But we were definitely Othering. Does that—sorry I don’t know how to explain.”
Try as I might, I can’t get out ahead of an investigation. The inspector’s words. The lamplight’s unbearably warm. He says, but wouldn’t I like to get out ahead of indictment? Tell him about the Immersium. Who were the superiors? How did I get involved in the cult? The inspector’s making a leap there. I’m not helping my case he says. I’m supposed to start at the beginning.
You want to get Adjacent. That’s how it begins, how you qualify for the Immersium.
There’s a barrier clarifying this thing with a cop. I don’t have a vernacular about weird physics. Doesn’t matter, it wouldn’t be easier except, I don’t know, maybe how to translate to a layman better. If he wants to know about THE process, it’s too peculiar to a person to help him.
My lawyer hushes me like an imbecile, petting my head. I never asked for him.
“The stock market is what got me.” The inspector looks like I’m being cryptic, but it really was. I placed huge bets through an online broker. One company’s stocks. I missed a windfall, talking about eight hundred thousand, by just one letter. So I had to get a… a Similar Fix, that was another term. I wanted a higher degree of similarity than I think anyone in the Immersium ever meant for themselves, just one little alphabetical mutation.
A wife and kids? I don’t remember. In the Immersium you wouldn’t cut ties with family or friends. That would be too Far. It wouldn’t be Adjacent. What? Why would I? I just wanted to have made a variation of a choice I made not even that long ago. It was so recent that it wouldn’t hardly be starting over anything, which is good because a Fix isn’t starting over as much as shifting over.
“It’s a realignment,” I mumble.
Life before… I’m drawing a blank. Can’t think. The inspector is the real criminal, saying nothing, infecting his silence into me. Looks at me with such animal curiosity, it’s no wonder I exhibit the sort of weirdness I know he expects. There’s something about being purposefully slightly off that has you stand out. Then you’re just confirming his bias because the insincere part of you is all he deserves. The more you intend to do something, the less you’re able to do any other way.
Before the cops picked me up, I thought I hadn’t gone nearly Far enough, but that was a contradiction. But I…
God. Oh God. I wouldn’t have considered doing it, but did I?
When I wanted to get Adjacent, the best I can remember isn’t who dropped me off or where, just that someone dropped me off somewhere. That’s my recollection of getting to the Immersium, but there’s actually something about the inspector’s room here that feels the same. It couldn’t be the same place. It’s the answering of questions that evokes some sense of familiarity. That much is the same, me answering questions and no one gets any satisfaction but they keep on. They won’t stop.
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zoologic Woo 